Monday, June 10, 2013

Flood Frogs

After a week of tsunami rainfall associated with this most recent tropical storm, the frogs are now croaking in high galore. There are so many . . . and they ARE loud.  

Hmmmm . . . were these flood frogs already there and simply scooting up the trees to escape the rising tide, or did the deluge trigger some sort of 17-year locust-like event?  And when someone kicks the bucket, why do we say he "croaked"?  Judging by the lusty racket of these tree critters now, dying is the last thing on the croaker's minds. 

Murder Mutts--Another child was killed here in Florida by an Alapaha (that’s a fancy name for "pit bull on steroids").  The owner, of course, expressed astonishment that his “sweat-natured and great with kids” dog would suddenly turn kid-killer.  What punishment should be meted out to this chap?  What punishment should be dished out to the loathsome cretin who owned that herd of four-legged food-blenders who attacked the mother and her daughter last month?  I'm sure many folks, including families of the victims, think the owners should be put down just like their dogs.  How about putting the miserable hides of these characters into public yokes or stocks like they did in the days of yore where all humanity could pass by and gawk at them?  Those who feel the urge can pelt their heads with rotten fruits, vegetables or manure, and, for those really outraged, some rocks and bricks will be provided.  If these beings manage to get killed, well, whatever.  If they survive, put them to work until all the victim’s medical  and funeral bills have been paid, then lock them in jail until someone remembers to let them out in thirty years.  One little boy slaughtered, and except for the bravery of a mother, we would have one little girl dead, as well.  By my books, that’s murder and attempted murder.

Note:  After reading several articles on these vicious attacks, I found it pretty sickening to read some of the comments from people defending pit bulls.  The main argument, it seems, is that pit pets are only as good, or as bad, as pit people; that a good owner will have a good pit, and a bad owner will have a bad pit.  Even if I believed that crock—and I do not—even if I believed that the pit bull was like any other dog and was not hardwired to maim, mutilate and murder, well, so what?  So what if a pit bull is only as good as the owner?  Look at the sub-humans who own them!  Losers, drug-addicts, small men trying to act tuff, large, fat men with insecurity issues, ignorant people of both sexes with absolutely nothing going on except drugs and tats, wanna-be tuff guys who hope a vicious pit or two are seen as macho extensions of their pathetic selves.  These irresponsible people do not consider, or care, that they are keeping a potential killer in the neighborhood.  And besides, even if the most saintly and benign person on earth owned a pit bull, that is absolutely NO guarantee whatsoever that something will not trigger murderous behavior when least expected.  I have lost count of the owners who, after this fatal attack or that fatal attack, whine about how this pit or that pit was raised from a pup as part of the family and had never exhibited any bad behavior before.  Just lost count. . . .

Senile Serial Sinkholes—Up near Tampa the other dawn, the senior crowd at the local Bob Evans was right in the middle of their 10,000 calorie breakfast gorge.  Suddenly, waitresses and cooks ran through the aisles shouting "Run!  Run for your lives!  Get the hell out!  We’ll all be killed!”   

Seems that the torrential rains from this recent tropical storm may have caused yet more sink holes in the area.  Naturally, the cracks on the walls and the building's situation a mere four miles from the recent deadly sinkhole event was more than enough to empty the restaurant of walkers, canes and wheel chairs in thirty seconds flat.  Only thing left when the smoke cleared was uneaten omelets and dentures still spinning on the tabletops.

So far, at last look, the Bob Evans restaurant is still located on earth’s surface and not under it.