Friday, April 15, 2011

More Squidbilly Wisdom

A slow news day on the senior sircuit, sooooooo. . . .

Earlie Cuyler (above, right): Rusty, you've got to keep the beat. What did I teach you about perseverance young man?

Rusty (above, left): That if at first you don't succeed, it wasn't meant to be. It's just a waste of time 'cause the unions just gonna take your money anyway, 'cause they jealous that we got an extra bone in our body that makes us smarter, but don't nobody in science care to acknowledge that, and I was an unwanted pregnancy, and I ruined your dirtbikin career, and get outta your sight ‘cause I disgust you! You talking bout that one daddy?

Earlie: If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, den shoot that lying summa' bitch goose and supa' down!

Earlie: Godalmighty, we ask you to bless this feast that lie before us, and please allow these spent lottery tickets with their silvery scratchery seasonings to nourish our bodies as they were unable to do the same to our wallets. Lord, thankya for the untimely frost you sent what claimed our pointless bananer orchards. Oh I was a fool to plant bananers on a mountain, you made sure of that. In short, thanks for nuthin'.

Clock of the Day