Lord! There is so much pervy news lately that it's almost impossible to keep up with all the sex crimes committed by our resident pedos.
Just the other day, up at nearby Siesta Key (above), one Jim “Chuck” Beles was observed sitting in a beach chair spanking his monkey. As he did so, he was lasciviously eyeing some children (ages six to 12) playing near him. Finally, when momentarily relieved of his overwhelming urge, Chuck waded into the surf. The water must have revived Beles for soon he was ready for another round of jerking his johnson.
Thus, when children passed near again, Chuck stood up in knee-deep water, pulled down his trunks then proceeded to do what he does best (in 2010 he was arrested for flogging his log at a local mall).
Well, pretty damned quick, cops reached the scene. When the sex-mad wretch insisted that the lawmen were arresting the wrong kiddie fiddler, then began to fight them, appreciative beach-goers were treated to some good-old-time-down-home taze justice. Hard for Chuck to contemplate matters carnal while doing a lively chicken dance in the sand and with all those volts surging through his unit.
Since he was already a registered sex offender the future looks pretty bleak for old Chuck. Yep, the judge will probably throw the book at him by sentencing the poor boy to a week or more of jail time then maybe a month or so of probation. Poor fellow. My bet: Chuck will be out shaking his snake before you can say Osama Bin La. . . .
After living on or near several beaches in my life, I am very aware that beautiful bodies fire up the libido in many of us. At the seaside--all sun, sand, surf, and salt--never are so many people wearing so little and showing so much of it. In my experience alone, I have lost count of the number of amorous couples I have seen, as they say, "loading the taco" literally in plain view of any and all. Personally, such a sexual display does not bother me much unless my ten-year-old twins are with me or I am showing grandma the beach for the first time. But obviously, such stuff has a much stronger impact on some of our weaker-willed brethren, like Chicken Chuck above, who come, who see, who fantasize, who then take it to the next revolting level.
When women flash their breasts from the balconies during Mardi Gras in New Orleans, invariably some aroused and emboldened male whips out his one-eyed weasel and does a little display of his own. See?
_____________________________________________________
Ho-Hum--Our local post office is going through it’s monthly repairs after 72-year-old Joe Bao blasted a new breezeway into the building yesterday. Judging by the photo, Joe utterly demolished some doors and a wall of the structure. Safe to say, had man, woman, child, meth addict, homeless vagabond, pelican, or loose pit bull been in the way, they would not be here among we mortals today.
Hardly does our post office finish patching old holes when along comes another addled geezer boring a new one. Perhaps officials should just leave well enough alone. Perhaps they should just give it up, admit defeat and let seniors destroy the building down to the last brick. After that, just pitch a large postal tent in the palms nearby to serve customers. True, “confused” folks like Joe, will continue to tear through the canvass but the damage will be vastly less expensive and the financially strapped business will be back and running in a day or so.
“Bao," wrote a reporter, "said he did not know exactly what happened, but his foot may have slipped between the brake and gas pedal.“ Right.
______________________________________________________
News You May Have Missed
